I was talking to some friends of ours last week, and they shared that they are about to do a “Yes Day” with their kids. In case you’ve never heard of it, a “Yes Day” is where you must say “yes” to your kids’ requests…all day long. All within reason, of course. They have a budget and ground rules - no changing the future is my favorite - keeps you clear of any unwanted guinea pig purchases or tattoos.
I was lying on my sub-human size blue couch this afternoon, and I had been saying No, feeling No, and thinking No ALL DAY. I thought of my friend’s glorious upcoming day of “Yes” and wondered if anyone has planned or woken up and decided it was okay to have a “No Day.” Ya know where everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, automatically is a “No.”
No, I did not want to exercise. No, I did not want to plan our 4th of July or grocery shop, and then actually heaven forbid, have to make dinner. Sadly, I did not even want to read a book. Big No, to cleaning the litterboxes. And a flat No to working on a puzzle with the kids. I didn’t even want to go for a walk or a bike ride. I stared out the window and thought, “It’s too hot.” But no, I did not want to go to the lake or the pool. I didn’t want to call a friend. I did talk to my sister for a brief moment, which went something like, “I’m in a bad mood, so I thought I’d call you.”
I’ll admit, saying No all day feels lousy. I started to hate it; it was just...heavy. It didn’t feel like rest, it felt like silence, but not the good and wise kind of silence like Zadie Smith wrote about recently in The New Yorker (Oh man read this, it’s so damn good - if you feel like it that is, if you’re having a No Day I respect that). It felt more like an opting out; there was a distinct Eeyore vibe. So I pushed myself a little closer to maybe, and then a few small yeses. I made our 4th of July plan. We cooked up some pancakes for dinner with a quick blueberry compote. And this made it feel like we’d made something beautiful, which was encouraging. A reward to the gentle, yes. We ventured around the block a few times on our bikes and came back sweaty and proud of ourselves. And it made me think that any day we do anything at all is a Yes Day. Every day we get out of bed, get dressed, eat some food, and leave the house - we’ve said yes…to something. In the end, let’s all hope we finally said yes to cleaning the litterboxes. I’m proud to say, I did.
Have you ever had a “Yes Day?” Or are there any “No Day” folks out there?
I do a lot of no days, it makes me feel unburdened, and free.